Listen: Trump's Kids Might Be Idiots But That's Not His Fault
Following news that Donald Trump's own children have forgotten to register to vote in the New York Primary we ask if the GOP front runner should be punished for having idiot offspring. Or is it time for Republicans to pull together so there is no repeat of the Obama win.
Here's the script (check against delivery):
Hello my name’s Andre Walker and your weekly monologue starts right now…
This was the week that Donald Trump lost two votes in the New York Primary when his own children forgot to register..
Some people got upset with the junior Trumps but I’m not so sure their mistakes should reflect on Trump senior.
Idiot children are not the end of the world, and they shouldn’t drag their parents down.
Remember the 1988 trash movie Twins??? What did it teach us?
You breed an olympic athlete with a beautiful model, and you might get a beautiful intelligent, gleaming, muscle warrior Republican Governator like Arnold Schwarzenegger.
Or you might get a fat, bald, boring, democrat like Danny Devito.
We have a saying in Britain, leftwingers are usually mingers, and for those of you unfamiliar with the word minger, think about Chelsea Clinton without the botox, or the face lifts or an underwired bra.
Why is Chelsea still hanging around when the Chinese, Yulin Dog Meat Festival is just week away.
They eat more dogs than the Democrat women's committee. Yes I do mean what you are thinking.
But back to the point of Mr Trump. Those of you that hate him need to open your eyes.
So let me deal with all the criticisms of Trump head on, and let's face it, head on is where the problems really lay.
You wanted beauty last time, and that’s what you got. In one Barrack Obama, the Amerophobe, and that is a new phobia I just made up, by the way.
We’ve got whole lot of phobias already, like LGBTG ZYZ KY JELLY, given there is such a whole lot of them, why not ad an ‘A’ hole to the list.
And as far as I’m concerned there’s no bigger ‘a’ hole than Mr Obama. He may not be a L, or a G, or a B, or a Q, or whatever else is on that list but he is an
Anti-gun, Anti-God, Anti-taxpayer, charlatan who has humiliated and lined up the Clinton’s to infest the White House one more time.
And worse still Obama is so bad for your allies that half the world are just begging for the day anyone takes over even Hillary, yes that’s right, you’ve annoyed NATO so much they think a Clinton would be an improvement.
Look Trump’s hair is real, no one would buy a wig that ugly. But shame on you America, wake up.
Don’t you realise that the world have no interest in listening to the world's only superpower bleet about hair do’s how it wants the same healthcare system as Uganda.
We want a leader and only the GOP is going to give us one. Just remind me which party was Reagan from, which party was George Bush from and which party was Eisenhower from?
I don’t care which GOPer gets the nomination, but I do insist you beat these nasty, evil, democrats.
Leader of the free world, Bernie Sander, give me a break, Colonel Sanders has done more for developing countries than Bernie ever will.
Colonel Sanders might be finger licking good, but Bernie’s fingers are far too green to lick, and licking the fingers of a Clinton is just crazy unless you really want genital warts, botulism and scabies.
That was the monologue until next week good bye.